The Voice Was Too Loud

It’s been a hard few weeks with the voice in my head being loud
I’ve stressed people out of that I am not proud
It’s been telling me to kill myself, “take a load of pills” I hear him say
I’ve been lucky so far, never want that day

Walking around on a busy road
Traffic weaving around me, lorries with heavy loads
Kind members of the public reassured me and took me to the side
How lovely of them to help me, they should all be full of pride

Then the police attended the site, asking me “what’s wrong?”
My mind was not my own, we seemed to be there so long
They took me to the floor, cuffed me behind my back
Held my legs, back and neck, I felt as though my bones were going to crack

I was taken to hospital to receive treatment for the overdose
I could have caused damage to my liver, it could well have been so worse
I was placed under a section, back to the Becklin was where I was to go
I hate being in there, always makes me feel so low

I had to stay in there for eleven days before I was let out
I got to the stage in there when all I did was scream and shout
It was great to be back home being with the people I hold dear
Settling back in to a routine, trying to keep my head clear

I now have to see Intensive Support Services of which I’m not a fan
I try to open up and trust them if I can
I am trying to keep busy, keep the voices and thoughts at bay
It really is not easy but I am taking it day by day

Hopefully in time the voice will disappear
Then I’ll feel relaxed, enjoy life without fear
I will go back to work, go out and meet with friends
I owe my family so much, I really must make amends

So I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I become well again
So all my hard work will not all be in vain